Why I retired from triathlon and joined that “crazy fitness cult.”
For almost two decades, I was an endurance athlete. I swam, biked and ran like it was my part-time job. I lived and breathed it, even became a certified triathlon coach along the way. I started with a 5k race in 1998 (clueless as could be, carbo-loading with a giant plate of pasta the night before) and was hooked. I quickly moved up to the half marathon, then marathon distance. The miles that I logged for the Chicago marathon left me with chronic pain in my left hip, so I shifted gears and found triathlon.
Road to Ironman
I raced my first sprint triathlon on a clunky mountain bike while women sped by me on tri bikes shouting, “On your left!” I left humbled, yet exhilarated. That race led to many more and culminated in 2005 with the grand-daddy race of them all, the Ironman. That’s a 2.4-mile swim, 112-mile bike, and 26.2-mile run. To prepare for a race of that distance required many sacrifices. Sleep was one of them. Early morning swims, long bike rides and runs all started at 5 am and took up a good chunk of the day. I averaged 6.5 hours of sleep per night during my peak training, not enough. I was sleep deprived.
I was hungry all the time. I was continually eating but struggled to keep up with a voracious appetite. I craved sugar and refined carbs to replace the thousands of calories I was burning. My fasted blood glucose was 95, an all-time high. No surprise there since I was consuming Clif Bars, GU energy gels and Endurance formula Gatorade (all sources of high amounts of refined sugar) before and during long workouts. I was tired, sore and crabby a lot. But I stuck with it because I had a big goal. My ego enjoyed the attention, and my competitive nature liked the challenge. Becoming an Ironman, the ultimate goal was going to be worth it.
Looking back, while it appeared that I was in great physical shape, my life was so out of balance. Train, race, coach, eat, sleep. Repeat. Not a sustainable recipe for a healthy life. My years in the sport took its toll on my body and ultimately, my first marriage. I did achieve my goal of becoming an Ironman. Crossing the finish line in Madison, WI was one of the hardest and proudest moments of my life. Now when I look back at that period of my life, I ask myself, “At what cost?” My marriage crumbled due to drifting priorities and selfishness. For years I continued to race triathlons and marathons. I ran to try and heal my broken heart. I ran to get numb. I ignored the aches and inflammation in my hip and feet. I fought the deep fatigue that had settled into my bones. I kept grinding because it’s what I knew and how people knew me. I kept chasing the endorphins of that addictive “Runner’s High.”
After a tough two year stretch from 2007 – 2009, which I think of
Motherhood
In 2012 and 2015 we were blessed with my greatest gifts, two baby boys, Wyatt and Finn. As a new mom, my workouts naturally shifted to long walks pushing the stroller, a mini strength workout in my living room and a short run when I could sneak it in. It was a different season in my life. If I went down the comparison road of “what I used to do” to what I was doing, I could have gotten myself into a negative space. For the next three years, I exercised consistently, doing my own thing, but without much purpose or passion. I was stuck in “maintenance” mode.
It wasn’t until JV came home one day in August and gifted me with a membership (thanks, babe!) to Ardent Fitness, our local CrossFit gym, that things got interesting. For 2+ years I had watched him work out consistently. He was stronger, leaner and happier than he had ever been. He used to be “too busy” to work out. Now he plans his day around his workouts. I was intrigued by https://www.crossfit.com/, but I had the typical preconceived notions (“I’ll get injured”, “I’m not strong enough” blah blah blah). On August 13th, when I walked into the “box” for my first Foundations class with Coach Chase, I was in for a surprise.
Five Pleasant Discoveries about CrossFit
1) All ages and fitness levels are welcome and celebrated. The camaraderie is everything. When a big guy who squats 400 pounds fist-bumps me when I do 140, I know I’ve found a special place.
2) The positive energy from coaches and members. Seriously, the most encouraging, helpful people you’ll ever meet
3) You’ll be met right where you’re at. Coaches will teach you everything you need to know, and every exercise can be scaled to your ability.
4) Good influence on kids. When your 4 and 6-year-old start doing burpees, handstands and air squats in the living room, you know it’s having a positive impact.
5) Lifting heavy things is totally therapeutic. I feel happier and stronger now than ever. My life feels balanced, I’m sleeping 8-9 hours each night, leaner, eating well, my fasted blood glucose is now at a very healthy 75 and my body feels good!
Exercise is woven deeply into my DNA, I’ve never stopped moving. But I realize that in the last several years, I was losing my desire. I needed a push, and I found it in CrossFit. I show up, do what I’m told, work hard, have fun, get stronger, and do it again. At CrossFit, I’m finding my “strong.” As I drip sweat at the end of a 12-minute workout and my quads burn as I walk up the stairs carrying laundry, I feel like an athlete again.
I have beautiful memories of my tri/run days. They are a big part of making me who I am today so in no way do I regret the time I dedicated to it. If you love triathlon, awesome. Keep doing what you love! But if you feel burnt out or your body feels beat up, and you’re looking for a new challenge, don’t be afraid to give CrossFit a try. It’s also a great complement to endurance sports as you’ll build a solid foundation of functional strength and fitness, likely improve your performance and prevent chronic injuries from muscular imbalances.
Find the sport or exercise that makes you feel good and lights you up. Be open to evolving into what is best for your body and mind for the season of life that you’re in. When you align your fitness goals with how you want to feel, life gets better. I want to feel strong and balanced. I want to have abundant energy to keep up with my boys. Thankfully, I have found that through CrossFit. Be ok with letting go of something that no longer works for you. That’s how we grow, my friends.